Feedback.

My husband asked today for positive feedback when he does positive things. We were in marriage counseling, and it took some wrestling on the part of our counselor (who I am coming to regard as a saint) to get clear about what he was needing. After lots of accusations and assertions that I beat him up all the time and criticize him and constantly point out every bad thing he ever does, it finally became clear that what he wanted from me was positive reinforcement.It was interesting in a lot of ways. First, I am always fascinated by his perception that I am critical. Even when things were at their worst, I felt like I exercised great restraint in not criticizing him. What he refers to as “criticism” can include offenses such as having the wrong face, noticing things that are true, or express…